Tuesday, October 27, 2009
X marks the spot
I'm not sure if you can read the above picture, but it is Joey's Kindergarten report card. He brought it home in his folder the other day. At first I was so excited! I'm thinking to myself I can't wait to look at it! I am so proud of how well he is doing in school! His social skills are great, his teachers really like him, he's been doing some great learning activities and his walking is getting better and better every day! As I started to read his report card, my emotions slowly deflated. Knows letter sounds...x. Knows letter names...x. Uses sounds to make words...x. Understands math concepts...x. Writes name...x. Counts objects correctly...x. I'm thinking "x"? What kind of grade is "x"? It turns out that "x" stands for "not evaluated at this time". I'm not sure what I was thinking...I guess I should have prepared myself somewhat before I looked at his report card. I guess I didn't know what his first kindergarten report card would be like. I was just excited to see it. I don't know if I thought I would see A's and B's like on John and Tommie's report cards...or E's, S's and G's for excellent, satisfactory and good. I don't know. All I know is I was sooooo excited that Joey brought home his first report card! And I can't leave out that he got two G's for music and two S's in P.E. Yay Joey! But it was seeing all those x's that really brought me down. Why is it when things seem to be going so great for your child there always seems to be one word, one phrase or one action that just knocks the wind out of you? Not evaluated at this time. Of course he can't be evaluated for these skills at this time...he is unable to do them. This is what hit me like a ton of bricks. When will he be able to be evaluated for these skills? When he is 10? 15? 20? 30? 40? I know he is unable to perform the same tasks as his kindergarten peers - but he has a great ability to learn. We have high hopes that someday he will be able to do these things. It's just kind of scary to not know when that someday will be. When you are raising a child, regardless of their abilities, there are joys and triumphs and unfortunately some sorrows too. Hopefully the joys and triumphs far outweigh the sorrow. This report card called life is full of A's, B's, G's, S's, E's and of course X's too. We just have to do the best we can. A friend of ours has this saying in her email signature: "Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending." So that's what I'm gonna do.